It makes me SO angry sometimes. How unfair things are. How ridiculously skewed luck is. How some people get away with what they do. How frustratingly deceiving some people are. How little of a back bone I have to let them get to me the way they do. I HATE being so affected by these negative things that are so unworthy of even a flicker of my time. Yet I do.

But I remind myself that everything - everything - I do, is a choice. How I bought a house even though I didn't really want to. But I don't blame circumstances or any other factor. Circumstances were the way they were, and I made a choice to go down the path I did, instead of any other path. I neither lament nor blame anyone or anything for the decisions I've made, because I, and only I, made those choices. They were my conscious, informed choices and I know that no one could have forced me to do what I did not want to do.

It is this, that helps me plod on. The fact that I am responsible for my life and choices that I have made, and I am at peace with my decisions. And when strength becomes fragile, I lean on my dearest friends near and far, who give me the little nudge that I need and who are just there for me, through thick and thin, who understand my innermost thoughts. Who ask me to suck this shit up and harden the fuck up, even when it hurts.

Take care.